Thursday, May 28, 2015

Thanksgiving Thursday



For those of you that don't know what Thanksgiving Thursday is, it is the one time during the week where you stop and basically count your blessings. Even if you've had one of those weeks, I promise you can find at least one thing to be thankful for, no matter how big or small.

This week I am thankful for...

  • 9 years with Scott. I cannot believe how fast these years have gone and I cannot wait to see what the future has in store for us!
  • Aaron who did amazing this year in school.
  • Jillian who also did amazing this year in school.
  • Family around us who have supported us through everything.
  • A kids free day with my hubby. I cannot wait! 
  • The fact that I can still fit in my wedding dress and that my friend Brian challenged me to try it on.
What are you thankful for this week?

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

9 Years

Normally, I share our wedding recap video, but this year I wanted to share some snapshots of us through the last 9 years. Enjoy!



Still want to watch our wedding recap? You can here

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Pre-Anniversary Reflections

I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around the fact that tomorrow Scott and I will be married for 9 years. It cannot possibly be that long. I honestly feel like I just met him.

I've spent the last few days reflecting back on our years together. I still remember the moment I met him. I was on the college program at Disney and he was the training manager for Main Street. I remember him sitting on a container outside of costuming waiting for all of us to finishing trying on our costumes.

I remember one of our most romantic moments, and we weren't even dating at the time. The park was closing and there was only one family left in the whole park. Scott was the manager on duty, so he was going to walk the last family out. He asked if I wanted to join him. Naturally, I said yes. We waited underneath the castle just talking about nonsense. It was, dare I say, magical. We were literally the only people there. It was perfect...well until he had to leave for a call and I had to walk the family out with an older security officer.

We've had a crazy time for the past decade or so. We've had our share of hard times, happy times and oh my God what are we doing times. I cannot imagine any other person I would want to share this journey with.

Happy day before our 9th anniversary, Scott!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Thanksgiving Thursday



For those of you that don't know what Thanksgiving Thursday is, it is the one time during the week where you stop and basically count your blessings. Even if you've had one of those weeks, I promise you can find at least one thing to be thankful for, no matter how big or small.

This week I am thankful for...

  • Scott who is my rock. He knows me better than anyone else and I know he has my back no matter what life throws at us.
  • Aaron who knows when to give me a hug.
  • Jillian who is amazing me with her progress.
  • Family all around us.
  • Real talk with my sister (and the fact that she will be here in a few weeks!)
  • My gym membership. It helps melt away the crazy.
  • Perspective.
  • A boss that brings in coloring sheets and pencils.
What are you thankful for this week?

Sunday, May 17, 2015

We've been busy...no really...

We've been busy and it's finally starting to slow down (God bless the end of the school year!).

Let's see... My sister sent me this awesome package for marathon training...


By the way, I'm training for a marathon. I may have forgotten to mention that at some point.

We completed another 5k as a family.


My office had a 5k for our foundations and we all ran the race, just not necessarily together. My friend Chelsie was there (she is now Aunt Chelsie to the kids) and she ran with Jill. Scott ran on his own and Aaron and I brought up the rear. Aaron took off like a bat out of hell at the beginning, so that last 1.5 mile was pretty rough.

We finished another season of baseball.


Aaron did so well this season and I cannot wait to see what happens in the fall.

We've done a whole lot more, but I'll be honest, it's all blurring together. I hope you are doing just as well as we are!



Thursday, May 14, 2015

Thanksgiving Thursday



For those of you that don't know what Thanksgiving Thursday is, it is the one time during the week where you stop and basically count your blessings. Even if you've had one of those weeks, I promise you can find at least one thing to be thankful for, no matter how big or small.

This week I am thankful for...


  • Scott who loves me at my best, but most importantly, loves me at my worst.
  • Aaron who had an amazing spring ball season.
  • Jillian and our morning snuggles.
  • Family all around us.
  • The end of a crazy week. I cannot tell you how much I looking forward to the weekend.
  • Coffee in the morning. 
  • All of the response to my last post. 
What are you thankful for this week?


Wednesday, May 6, 2015

The Four Words I Didn't Want to Say.

I've struggled with this post for a while. It's been a few months and the words just never made it on the screen. They ran through my mind several times, but I could just never get them down, and quite frankly I wasn't sure if I wanted to put them down. Then as any 32 year old would do, I asked my Mom if they would be okay if I wrote it down and she said absolutely.

Tuesday was the sillies birthday and as I do every year, I made a year in review video. When I was talking to my parents they both told me that it was great, but then my Dad said, "Thank you, this really brought back a lot of memories." I said, "You're welcome!" and tried to be as cheerful as possible. Then I completely broke down.

It's such a simple phrase, "...this really brought back a lot of memories." What you don't know is that phrase means the world to me.

My Dad has Alzheimer's.

We found out around Christmas. I honestly cannot remember if it was before or after. It actually may have been around New Year's. My Mom mentioned it in a passing kind of way. "The doctor's appointment went well, the tests came back..blah blah blah...and then we picked up your Dad's Alzheimer's medication." Say what?

I'm not going to lie, I've suspected it for a while, I think we all have, but actually hearing it was almost to much to handle. He's really not in a specific stage yet, it's still really early. They have him on a medication to help offset some of the symptoms, which is great, but this is just the beginning of what I know is going to be a long hard road.

My grandmother and great aunt also had Alzheimer's and that of course begs the question, is it genetic? We're not sure. I know it was rough with my grandma. I will never forget when I was pregnant with Aaron and Jill and one of the local hospitals in Chicago called me. They said they needed someone to calm my grandmother down (she was admitted there that day). I couldn't figure out how they got my number or why they were calling me when my parents were literally 15 minutes away. That conversation was one of the hardest I think I've ever had and was magnified by my pregnancy hormones (times two). I knew then what was going on and was not ready to begin to process it.

For the most part when I talk to my Dad he's having a good day. We definitely have the same conversation a lot, but he still knows who I am, he still knows my kids and really, that's all that matters. Right now I cannot let the idea of what's to come bog me down, I have to relish each moment that I have with him and plan for the times that those memories will not come back as easily.

They are coming down in November to spend Thanksgiving with us. To say that I am excited to have them here would be an understatement. I love being with my family during the holidays. However, this Thanksgiving will be a little more emotional and a little more special.

The shitty thing about this disease is we do not have a time frame to work within. It's not like any other illness where a doctor can look at a chart and say, "you have 3-4 months." It's not that simple. The whole thing is a sick roller coaster, but I'm trying to overlook that for as long as I can.

I want to enjoy these times and I want him to enjoy these times. I know in the future he may not remember it, but I will and my kids will and really, that's what matters. I know he will always love me, even though it terrifies me that one day he will have no idea who I am.

I go through waves with this news. I have my days where I accept it for what it is and do my research trying to absorb as much information as I can. I try and read the research (specifically from overseas, because let's face it, they have their shit together) and see what advances are being made.

Then there are the days that I am doing something normal, like making dinner, and something sets me off. One night, "The Way You Look Tonight" (Tony Bennett's version) came on and I had to stop what I was doing. The weight of the disease hit me. Someday he could forget that we danced to that song at my wedding. That he sang the last few verses to me as we danced. That I chose that version because of a story he would tell from when my brother Kevin went to Western Illinois and my Dad saw Tony in the hall and yelled, "Ay, Tony!"

We are in for the long haul on this and I am beyond thankful to have Scott by my side. I honestly cannot think of a better support than him. (There's something to be said about marrying a Southern, ladies, they are the strong silent type)

I'm also thankful for the memories that have been made and that will be made. I'm thankful that movies like "Still Alice" are winning awards and gaining recognition. I can only hope that movie will do for Alzheimer's what Philadelphia did for HIV/AIDS and bring more awareness to the disease that affects more than 3 million people living in the United States.

This journey is just beginning, but I am ready to be there with my Dad, to support my Mom and my siblings. We are on this crazy ride together and we need to enjoy every possible second.





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