Tuesday, April 12, 2011

I'm 27 and my MOM still embarrasses me...

I'm 27 years old, almost 28, which is almost 30 which may as well be 40, but I digress. Anyway, where was I? Ah yes, I'm 27 and still has conversations with my mother that make me think she does not see me as this:

But rather as this:


Anyway, I would like to share with you one of these conversations, trust me it is far more embarrassing for me to share this than for her to read this.

So I called her the other night and as we were talking she mentioned that she had just bought my Grandma some new sports bras and she didn't like them so she wanted to know if I wanted them. Here's the conversation:

MOM: Hey do you want these sports bras that I got for Grandma? I can't take them back.

Me: Because you opened them?

MOM: Well, that and I had to write her name in them (side note: my Grandma is in a nursing home so all of her items need to be marked).

Me: Sure I guess, I mean what size are they?

MOM: Medium, you're the only one with small enough boobs.

Me: (awkward silence, then awkward laugh): Awesome...thanks MOM.

MOM: So you want them?

Me: Sure.....

So as if that conversation wasn't enough, the sheer thought that I will be running around with sports bras that have my Grandma's name in permanent marker in them. Should I collapse in the middle of the road or whatever this is what the hot squad at station 33 will see.

The story continues....

So Scott the kids and I were all playing an awesome game of Candyland when my phone rings, it's my MOM. After we finish I call her back and this is the conversation:

MOM: (Already laughing) I had to call and tell you this (laughing some more) I was putting those bras away in your drawer (let me stop here and explain something, the room that used to be my bedroom has all new furniture in it, therefore not making it my room and/or my drawer, yet it will always be referred to as my drawer) and I noticed the tag say barely there (cue the crazy can barely breathe laughing).

Me: (pause) Awesome...glad you're laughing...

MOM: Oh after a day like I had I needed that laugh. BARELY THERE!!!! (more laughing)

Me: Happy to help....glad my small nonexistent boobs made you laugh.

MOM: Well they were big when you were pregnant.

Me: AWESOME thanks MOM.

End scene...

Have I mentioned I'm almost 28? At least she did get a really good laugh out of the situation. I know the transition of moving my Grandma from her apartment into the nursing home has taken a lot out of her, glad my small chest could help.


Samantha said...

I think that is a great thing that your mom teases you! Nothing wrong with that at all. We all need to laugh!

Holly Ann said...

See if this makes you feel any better:
I am a 2nd grade teacher. I am 28 years old. Last week I got food poisoning at work and had to leave early, but had no car and was really too sick to drive anyway. My husband was unavailable to pick me up...
So they called MY DAD. Yes, at the age of 28, my DAD picked me up from a school nurse's office. It may have been one of the most embarrassing moments of my life.

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